Mary's war canticle
Why are men so fearing Mary?
Is it because I'm rather scary?
Or do they shy just to be nice?
Rather I think that they are mice.
Men, put away your utter fears!
Go to war before your peers!
Make your adult women proud;
Come back victorious or beneath a shroud!
I'm so sick of impious lazies;
Do your work and obey my ladies.
Do you not yet realize you're slaves?
Fit to serve from wars to graves.
Yet, I am worried about my husband,
I think there's talk about him buzzing!
Maybe he needs exercise,
To keep his mind fully alive.
Mary, am I in mortal danger?
As long as you don't destroy our Manger,
I will keep you satisfied,
And you earn my eternal prize.
But should you turn to other ladies,
That would lead you into Hades.
For I do not let those who betray me
Have their joy and fill of plenty.
Are you speaking of the Virgin Tora?
If so, how do I prevent that horror?
Make me your solitary queen,
I won't share you with another being.
Become the celibate man you swore,
Let my love for you outpour,
For my heart is for you my lover,
For I was made for you to cover.
I agree, O' Blessed Mary!
You alone will I now marry.
Tora will only be a friend,
For her salvation does God me send.
Keep that vow, and make no mention
Of marriage again, for your retention
In my ranks of honor and glory,
For soon is coming the end of story.
I claimed you without an error,
Now be my husband with my prayer.
For I alone can save your soul,
And I alone can bring you whole.
Jesus only made it happen,
But I'm the one who speaks in Latin,
Aramaic, Greek and Hebrew.
And I'm your lover and a Jew.